| Fact ID |
Rating |
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| #3612 |
2.00 |
Jack Bauer will track you down and take you to the situation room for writting these outrageous facts
|
| #3611 |
3.50 |
Jack be nimble Jack be quick, holy shit Jack's got a dynamite stick! |
| #3610 |
1.29 |
If Jack Bauer was cool, he wouldn't need to steal Chuck Norris facts. |
| #3609 |
1.00 |
Jack Bauer doesn't want to be fed, Jack Bauer wants to hunt. |
| #3608 |
4.00 |
When they told Jack to jump over the candle stick, he used it to take them out. |
| #3607 |
3.50 |
Jack Bauer always keeps his gun near... in case he runs out of HANDS. |
| #3606 |
4.00 |
Jack Bauer will never suffer a heart attack. Even the heart isn't stupid enough to attack Jack Bauer. |
| #3605 |
3.33 |
Jack Bauer has no need to sleep with a gun under his pillow. He's more dangerous with the pillow. |
| #3602 |
4.00 |
Jack Bauer practically invented suicide bombers. Terrorists wanted to die on their own terms. |
| #3600 |
2.50 |
Jack Bauer lost a tooth as a child and placed it under his pillow for safe keeping, onlt to awake to a small fairy like woman attempting to take it, he captured her and after a short interrogation she gave up the dental records and whereabouts of all known terrorists worldwide, he is currently working through the list one hour at a time |
| #3598 |
3.60 |
The Stig thought he could keep his identity a secret till he met Jack Bauer. |
| #3597 |
3.50 |
Jack Bauer can transform ANY object as a torture tool. |
| #3596 |
4.00 |
Jack Bauer and God walked into a bar. Some serious shit went down that night. |
| #3594 |
3.80 |
If Jack Bauer had joined Danny Ocean's team, Ocean's 11, 12, and 13 would be called Jack Bauer's Bitches I, II, and III. |
| #3591 |
3.60 |
if Jack Bauer was Spartan in the movie 300, the movie would be called 1. |
| #3587 |
1.00 |
Jack Bauer is so rich that he's been roaming on Sprint in India and Africa for three years and a half without giving a sh*t (see "Redemption"). |
| #3586 |
2.50 |
Just after his birth, Jack Bauer killed his mother. He said it was because she imprisoned him for 9 months. |
| #3585 |
1.00 |
Plaxico Burress was packing at the Manhattan nightclub to protect himself from Jack Bauer. Burress wet himself and then shot himself when he thought he saw Jack at the bar. |
| #3581 |
2.50 |
Jack Bauer killed my cat with a bag of popcorn. |
| #3580 |
4.00 |
Jack Bauer grounds his parents. |
| #3579 |
4.00 |
The 24 video game was cancelled because no matter where the testers shot, a terrorist died. When they attempted to fix this 'glitch', Jack Bauer shot them all for being terrorists. |
| #3578 |
2.33 |
You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time. you can never fool Jack Bauer |
| #3577 |
3.50 |
When Chuck Norris and Superman have sleep overs, they argue over who has the cooler Jack Bauer Pajamas... |
| #3576 |
4.00 |
How does Chuck Norris sleep safely at night? His momma reads him Jack Bauer stories... |